The moment your child walks out the door to leave for college, your mind becomes like a pinball machine of emotions. You’ve dreamt and done your best as you watched your little baby grow up and thrive. Even so, it’s hard to describe what it feels like when they set off on their own. You worry about them and make plans to support them, but what are doing for yourself? After all, this is also a major adjustment for you.
All life transitions — big, small, happy, or sad — involve stress. Therefore, your child leaving for college can impact you in ways you didn’t expect. How will you deal with the anxiety?
What Might Cause Anxiety in This Scenario?
Of course, you’ll be wondering how your kid will do on campus. Between academics, social life, finances, peer pressure, and more, your child will have more on their plate than ever before. So, a big part of any anxiety you experience is the not-knowing. They’re no longer under the same roof and you’re beginning the necessary but challenging process of letting go.
In the meantime, there are plenty of other sources of anxiety:
- Routines Are Changing: Parenting has always been more than a full-time job. Now, it’s closer to a part-time job. So much of your daily rhythm is shifting, and this requires patience to cope with.
- Missing Them: Let’s face it. You will feel lonely — especially if we’re talking about an only child. This can be a time of grief.
- New Expectations: If you’re married, you and your spouse will be reinventing parts of your relationship. If you have other kids, they’ll be stepping up in new ways.
- Seeing Yourself Differently: It feels like yesterday that you were in school. Now suddenly and unexpectedly, you’re old enough to have a college-age child. Realizations like this are known to provoke anxiety.
Helpful Ways to Cope With Anxiety When Your Child Leaves for College
Before mentioning any tips, it’s important to note that anxiety disorders are diagnosable conditions that should not be taken lightly. High levels of anxiety may have always been present but just now have been made more obvious by the big change. Keep this in mind as time passes so you can discern what’s going on. In the meantime:
Set Up and Stick to a Communication Plan
It’s never been easier to stay in touch than it is today. Work directly with your child to choose which days, times, and platforms are best for both of you. Of course, there will be times when spontaneity is necessary, but it can ease everyone’s mind if you’re on the same page about communication.
Create New Connections With the Rest of Your Family
If you have a spouse and/or other children, this is an exciting chance to re-invent those connections as you all adjust to a big household change. Get creative as you approach the opportunity to deepen bonds.
Practice Self-Care and Self-Compassion
Anxiety of any kind becomes more bearable when you prioritize your well-being. You will probably have a little more time on your hands, so think about:
- Committing to a regular exercise routine or taking up a sport
- Settle into a more regular sleep pattern if possible
- Make healthy eating and drinking choices
- Cultivate relaxation techniques — like yoga, meditation, and more!
- Rebuild your social life and make some new friends
- Take up hobbies and interests that have previously been on hold
Learn More About Anxiety
Your kid leaving for college is enough to cause anxiety in anyone. But, again, there could be more going on beneath the surface. Contacting a therapist is a proven method for learning more about yourself and your needs.
